Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Not So Superheavy

This may not be true, but I'm saying it anyway. This is the worst thing I've ever heard.

I'm saying it for two reasons.

One: it's a dumb idea.

Two: the record didn't surprise me. I didn't hit play and think after 5 songs, "Wow. This is really good!"

No. Superheavy sounds as dumb as I thought it would sound.

Factory-setting reggae beats. Mick Jagger doing his best (or worst) Jagger, over-enunciating in that painful, 1994 "Out Of Tears" voice or in that phony Jamaican lilt.  Joss Stone vamping and moaning, mostly in the wrong key. Dave Stewart, a musical conundrum if there ever was one. Friends with everyone and I'm not sure why. The Eurythmics weren't that good. Look at his credits HERE. Unless having the distinction of producing mediocre records for some of your favorite stars is a good thing, I don't get Dave Stewart.

What's next? Superheavy 2? How about Roger Daltrey, Al. B. Sure, Shinehead, Lisa Lisa and Rupert Hine? That's a good idea, no?


Alan said...

Sal: I'm willing to bet you've heard worse. There'll always be a faster gun, there'll always be another one. That being said, the record sounds excruciating.

Jeff Matthews said...

Just to confirm their irrelevance, Rolling Stone gave Superheavy 4 stars...

steve simels said...

Excruciating isn't the word.

The most unlistenable vanity project ever, unless there's a worse one I've mercifully blocked from my memory.

steve simels said...

And I was just about to guess that Rolling Stone would rave about it.

Jeebus, Wenner is really a putz.

FD13NYC said...

Totally agree with Sal. I downloaded and listen to it (well skimmed through it is more like it). What a mess! Insipid ballads, and that reggae dub dung which I utterly can't stand.

Don't know why artists do these kind of projects, a complete waste of time. I guess the curiosity was strong because Jagger is on it. This is real Supercrap. Oh well, go figure.

Anonymous said...

Masked Marauders anyone?


buzzbabyjesus said...

I think you were too kind. I was just dissing Jagger for his lack of authenticity on "Faraway Eyes" and now this. Multiply my complaint by Avogodro's number.
I never heard of SuperHeavy until just now. I watched the video for "Miracle Worker".
Then I wiki'd them. Apparently they wrote 29 songs in 10 days. After watching the video I have no trouble believing that.
Four stars in Rolling Stone?
Can you say Blow Job?
Really, words fail.

A walk in the woods said...

Hilarious, Sal. I have only heard that one song they put out early, I'll have to schedule this on a week when I hope to win the lottery b/c I'm hoping the good and the bad balance themselves out.

I know why Jagger does this. It's because he cannot stand the idea of being old. And he can't stand the idea of recycling Stonesy riffs. (Although I'd say a bunch of songs off their last few albums are really truly among my favorite Stones songs. That's right, dammit! Play "Let Me Down Slow" from 2005's "A Bigger Bang" and try to tell me it's not a great, classic Stones song.)

Bob Dylan is one of the only musicians I can think of who is finding a way to age gracefully. Rod Stewart is oohing and aahing to the ladies, Jagger is doing crazy things like this, Neil Young is - wait, Neil Young is still pretty cool.

But Dylan is one of the only ones who says, "I am old; I will not collaborate with Rupert Hines; Dig my oldness or keep on movin'." I respect that.

p.s. after all that, I must say I still have to actually hear this whole thing. I am just that much of a Stones fan. I mean, buzzbabyjesus, I actually like "Faraway Eyes", and Sal, I do like "Out Of Tears." Apologies...

Sal Nunziato said...

Go check out some "Far Away Eyes" action over at www.powerpop.blogspot.com

I LOVE that song. Always have.

Anything Should Happen said...

I suspect you are gonna get four yesses for this.

Think of poor little me, I had to review the f-ing thing. It wasn't from Rolling Stone.

Why would people want to get involved in this rubbish, which exec nodded it through and what has happened to Joss Stone?

Answers on the back of a cigarette packet please.

I'd largely agree with you about Dave Stewart, but have one exception.

Greetings From The Gutter is a really enjoyable album but that's it.

Can't agree with A Walk In The Woods about Dylan being the only one to grow old gracefully.

There are plenty who aren't but if you like I can produce a very long list of people who are if you like.

buzzbabyjesus said...

I'm finished ragging on that poor song. Compared to "Miracle Worker", it's a classic.

A guy called Tak said...

OK, I just checked the album on Amazon.com..
It's not "A mad alchemist type experiment" but "A well-made product".
I guess another Mick Jagger solo album cannot save Universal Republic!
Record companies last attempt of saving their business after SuperExpensive deluxe packages one after another - SuperGroup, next?
So, we're gonna see more of Blind Faith, CSN&Y or The Masked Marauders?

wool said...

yeah...sounds pretty shitty. I'm sure keith is having a good laugh. If the stones would do a flat out country/rock album it would do well. Mick has the voice for it.

Eric said...

this sets me up for the foghat/dave edmunds reunion.

unkerz said...

I really must agree with you on this one.It's temped tripe.After all they reportedly did it in 3 weeks(& it sounds like it).

Anything Should Happen said...

Maybe duets with dead stars, oh we've tried that

The PopCulturist said...

Dave Stewart is supposedly a very good drinker and bon vivant. At least that's why Dylan used to hang with him, and I wouldn't be surprised if it goes a long way with the rest of his swell pals, too.

There is a funny story about Bob going to visit Stewart in London in '92 or 3; knocked on the door and said he was there to see Dave... kindly old lady let him in, said Dave wasn't in right now but would he wait, made him a cuppa tea... and when "Dave" returned, it was just some average Joe, or average Dave, I guess -- Bob had the wrong house!

buzzbabyjesus said...

I got out my copy of "A Bigger Bang", which I bought from Sal, and managed to get through a whole verse of "Let Me Down Slow" before remembering why I'll never fall for that "Best Stones album since Some Girls" line again. "A Bigger Bang" blows.
Fortunately "Life" was probably the last nail in the coffin and there won't be any more regrettable Stones product.
Besides, Mick's got a new band.

A walk in the woods said...

ASH, let us know your other favorite artists who are aging well. Leonard Cohen & Tom Waits would be in there, and Paul Simon's new album has some greatness on it, I would include them. Robert Plant is doing it in style. Actually there are more than I thought...

buzzbabyjesus, I did mean to mention "Life" as the other reason Mick did this. Mick's miffed.

buzzbabyjesus said...

Brian Eno has aged fairly well.

A guy called Tak said...

Also John Cale(better than Lou) and Randy Newman aged well.
Todd...he is still Todd!

I sampled Daryl Hall's upcoming new solo album, sounds promising but very much like "Daryl does Hall & Oates by himself". Let's see...

Anything Should Happen said...

All those mentioned.

Nick Lowe, Neil Diamond, Ian Hunter, Ray Davies, Eric Clapton, Paul McCartney to add a half dozen.

I'm not fans of all but they have just continued to make music that they like, not expecting to sell loads and not appearing to be ego driven.

A walk in the woods said...

Good point about all those mentioned. I'd forgotten about McCartney; I love his last couple albums.