Long time, pain in the ass Kinks collector approaches table.
Me: (under my breath) Oh no.
KC: Hey. What's up? Got any Kinks?
Me: (playing along) A couple of things. There's a really nice original "Something Else" in there.
KC: I have it.
Me: Of course, you do. You have everything. You're a Kinks collector. Why do you always ask when you know there's nothing you need?
Stares blankly into my eyes.
KC: Do you have The Rascals "Once Upon A Dream?"
Me: (excited) YES! A beautiful MONO copy, $5.00!
KC: I only need the booklet. Would you sell me just the booklet?
Me: (stunned) What? No! You kidding?
KC: But I have it. I only need the booklet. I lost the booklet.
Me: It's $5.00!
KC: (confused) Do you trade?
Me: (surrendering) Sure.
KC: I didn't bring anything. You won't sell me the booklet?
Me: I'll tell you what, buy the record for $4, I'll knock a buck off and you can have the booklet for free.
I do believe I caused a short of some kind, as he just stood in silence, eyes rolling like a slot machine. Finally...
KC: I'll come back.
LATER THAT DAY, TEN MINUTES BEFORE WRAP-UP
KC BROWSING THROUGH A BOX OF $1.00 45s. FINDS THREE JOE JACKSON SINGLES.
KC: I need these two, but I think I have this one.
Me: Well, I'm packing up.
KC: I want these two. Can you hold them?
Me: I'm leaving. The show is over.
KC: But I don't remember if I have this one.
Me: Give me two dollars. Take all three. If you have that one, throw it out.
KC: (smoke coming out of ears) But I may have this one.
I'm pretty sure he is still standing there, holding three Joe Jackson 45s. Did not buy The Rascals.