Bang Bang! I Am The Worrier.

I live for summer. The hotter, the better. Light clothing, the ocean, baseball and best of all, no snow to shovel. These are all highlights of the summer months for me, not to mention some of the greatest music attached to some of my greatest childhood memories.

This is Labor Day Weekend, the unofficial end of summer. I have not seen the ocean once. Baseball is sadly, a joke. But best of all, no snow to shovel. Today happens to be a glorious weather day in N.Y.C., and yet I am okay with staying the masked course, and keeping away from crowds, however much I could use a time out from the madness for a few laughs, a few beers with friends and a big salt water breeze.

Yet, I can't do it. I can't do it yet. I can't do it because I still see people out and about in my neighborhood walking in groups of four and six, masks on their chins, or dangling from their ears. I can't do it because I've watched the numbers slowly but surely creep up over the last few weeks, as more places opened for business, and more people became stir crazier.

Coincidence? You do believe in Science, yes?

I can't do it, and I am really okay with it.

This morning, two friends within minutes of each other, mentioned how they were both (separately, coincidentally) heading north and south respectively, to partake in some "indoor dining," that is still banned in the five boroughs. They were both "very excited." I was not. I offered a somewhat cold, "Enjoy" and that was the end of the conversation...almost. One friend said, "You're such a worrier. Live a little." The other said, "If not now, when? Gotta go out sometime!" That was the end of the conversations.

A good friend of mine, who also happens to be a well respected surgeon, offered this advice to me, "Listen to Dr. Fauci. Doubt everyone else."

It seems like traveling to Port Washington for some Veal Picata isn't quite appealing enough to me to risk my health or the health of loved ones. Sitting around outside, pretending I am enjoying some Eggs Benedict and a Bloody Mary while a mask is hanging below my chin, all the while trying to ignore a death count of close to 200,000 with a projected doubling by December, just isn't that appealing to me. If that makes me a worrier, then I'm a worrier. But I certainly don't need to be laughed at for trying to do the right thing. It is not yet "sometime" for me.

Enjoy your meals. You have every right. But also, fuck you and your name-calling and guilt trips.

Thanks for letting me rant.

Have a great weekend.