Wednesday, January 20, 2021

Pardon Me



With just a few hours left before we have a new actual leader in the White House, I'd like to take a few moments to pardon a few people myself.

Mary J. Blige for having a career while never singing on key, either live or in the studio.

Todd Rundgren for every attempt at rap, hip hop and electronic dance music.

Gary Cherone and Van Halen III.

Bruce Springsteen for "Harry's Place" which makes "Outlaw Pete" sound like "Jungleland."

Drake for "God's Plan." (Talk about working in "mysterious ways.")

Van Morrison and Eric Clapton and their lame-ass anti-lockdown song.

The Grateful Dead for the "1969 Fillmore Good Lovin' Massacre."

Aerosmith for all 30 power ballads since 1993 that sound exactly the same.

Every Dave Matthews fan.

Jagger. Richards. "You Got Me Rocking."

Whoever green-lighted "Orange Crate Art."




Anonymous said...

great idea, Sal. I pardon who got a slicker sound but not better material after jumping to a major. (inspired by Rachel Sweet)

paulinca said...

Snarfed my coffee. Thank you, Sal!



makes "Outlaw Pete" sound like "Jungleland."

Okay ... laugh of the day and it's only ten in the morning!

Thanks Sal

Slidewell said...

I must have missed your rant about Orange Crate Art. Shit, it's the only post-Beach Boys Brian Wilson I can listen to.

M_Sharp said...

How about Bowie and Jagger for the "Dancin' In The Streets" video? But that might be a crime too heinous to pardon.

Kirke said...

The Bowie/Jagger *without music* is the WORST. But what a great day! All is forgiven today. Meet the new boss. Not the same as the old boss.

cmealha said...

It's funny, after reading the first entry and realizing what you were doing, the first thing I thought of was Van Halen with Cherone. Should have been #1.

Anonymous said...

hey sal, fuck you.

Sal Nunziato said...

Gary Cherone in the house.

heartsofstone said...

Harry's Place is awfu, but Outlaw Pete is as well. Outlaw Pete is worse for me - the whole Kiss riff thing. Harry's Place sounds like bad 80s Don Henley to me.

Anonymous said...

Not really familiar with 'em, but I know you're a fan: I saw that New Radicals reunited for Biden's inauguration. Better'n the old radicals that desecrated the Capitol on January 6!
C in California

George said...

Hilarious, Sal.

Michael Giltz said...

HAHAHAHAHA. Sorry I missed this earlier. A bit distracted by that happily peaceful transfer of power. I mean EVENTUALLY peaceful transfer of power. Very funny. I still LIKE Orange Crate Art but I did downgrade it after some recent listens to merely good. I've got a soft spot for Van Dyke Parks, I guess.